Bittersweet

It's been a strange week-and-a-half.

My first short film, "Hermes", was finally finished and it now remains to be seen what it can do for me, how many doors in my career it can open wide or not. Of course I am not completely happy with the result. But given the time, finances and circumstances involved, it is, I feel, a very good short film. There are lots of things I would change, but again, the day when I will be completely happy with the outcome of my work, not being able to find any faults to it, will be the day to pack it in. In the end, I also got a sense of sadness, because after a year and a half it is finally finished and now I have to move on. Bittersweet...

Second thing that happened, is I realised I am falling in love. I am not "In Love" yet, but I guess seriously on the way there. With someone I met almost three months ago. We started off as casual acquaintances, then moved on to being friends, a situation I was very comfortable with. Chemistry between us never went away though, and last week, after a few things that happened between us, I realised my feelings must have changed, and I don't even know if they are now mutual between us anymore. I think I sort of panicked and kept a bit of a distance, which ended up being reciprocated. And now I stand wondering what on earth to do, though I already have started to fall OUT of love already for various reasons. But the feeling of falling in love, even if it is for a short time, is always happy, and it's certainly been a while for me... Bittersweet again...

Life is a strange ol' thing. Pulls you up in heavens of joy on one minute and then, throws you down into the mud the next.